Trust

Hi, my name is Morenike and I trust people. I, however, am dying a slow painful death due to people not keeping their word. I am so disappointed right now. Not in people, but in myself. It is beginning to feel as if trust is a personality flaw more than anything else. Trust is beginning to feel like a defect. This does not feel good. I feel conflicted. I feel as if I am having to change who I am at the core to protect myself. I have always hated to experience being around suspicious jaded people. I don't want to be one of them. It took years to get my vengeful side under control and now, due to various events, I am struggling with it again. I have even begun to validate the behaviors that I am considering. I'm just tired of this. I need to find the balance so that I can adjust my behavior and views accordingly. Sorry this wasn't written with a nice flow, but this just me...in my feelins.