When I write posts like this I always try to be careful not to step out of place being that I am so young in this culture. I have been thinking about something since we came back from our visit with our Iya , Yeye, Baba 'Fakoyode, and the rest of the Ile.
We took our vessels down to be fed. During a part of the ceremony I watched as Yeye did something that I wouldn've thought was bullshit or a parlor trick had I not seen it myself. I won't mention it here as I don't know if it's appropriate. I was thinking that that kind of Ase can ONLY come from the continent. Not that she can't teach us the same things here as we are ready to learn them, but that the knowledge has to come from the source and must remain unchanged in order to maintain the same amount of Ase. Although she lives in the states, she returns home to Nigeria to continue training from master teachers there.
On FB, there is a group that is basically a mixture of all kinds of African spirituality and even mixes of particular traditions. The more I study the more I realize that we, as children of the diaspora, try to take these traditions and make them our own. The funny thing is that it sounded like a good thing not so long ago. Now, I see more and more that we MUST keep the traditions as they are intended to be kept.
There are reasons that Ifa has morphed into other paths such as Santeria. This was to keep the tradition alive in the face of the HORRIBLE slavery (Maafa) that our ancestors endured. Well, now that it doesn't have to be kept secret anymore, many choose to no longer acknowledge that the source of their Santeria belief is Ifa that originated in Nigeria. Here is an article about it. It would seem that Africa continues to be the mother of ungrateful bastard children that refuse to honor Her as their source.
As most of you know, I don't not glorify integration. There are somethings that are better executed within particular groups, and I do NOT believe that we have to share all of our belief and concepts with each other. We simply should respect them and keep it moving. Think of it like the human body. There are parts of the body that are not to be seen by everyone. They are considered sacred. Why then, do we feel obligated share the secrets of our traditions with people that have constantly/consistently sought to destroy us in the name of integration and belonging? An example of Americanization and Europeanization can be seen here. When I was first trying to find my way, I found that there are a lot of "others" writing about African tradition and cultures and their materials are being mainstreamed while those who are actually able to accurately teach/write are not pushed into the limelight in the same way. I guess everyone many people want to make money and bend Ifa to their own will. This brings me to my next point of individualize practices.
Now, I have learned from my elders that there are certain things that you may be told to do differently from someone else. For example when my husband and I do our morning prayers, it looks different. We teach our children our differences, which are VERY slight and we teach them why we have chosen to do it the way we have. Clearly, this is not the individualism that I am speaking of. I am talking about people who are angry, jaded, or just plain arrogant and have decided that they don't have to learn from anyone, teach anyone, or participate in a community. NOBODY in the world knows all of the mysteries of Ifa so that means that we ALWAYS have more to learn and the way this culture works is that we have teachers. This culture is NOT based on writings as it is an originally an oral tradition. Oral traditions by their very nature mean that you MUST interact with others...a community. We live in NC, but our ile is in Ga. We have been down twice and although we would love to go more often we stay in constant communication, we study a lot with materials suggested by elders, and we double check that information to see if it is the same as what is done in our lineage. The connection that we feel with our Ifa family is unbreakable. We are truly blessed beyond measure. We are truly ride-or-die for each other. As for the teaching, my husband and I are not in an official position to teach, but of course we teach our children whatever we learn. I even teach the concepts I learn in Ifa to others by putting it in plan language. Because Ifa is not a conversion "faith" I've found that no matter who I am talking too and what they believe, unbeknownst to them they find Ifa to be strong and true. ;)
I realize that this post was really long, but I had some thangs on my chest. Please feel free to respond to what has been said if you agree and especially if you don't agree. lol
Showing posts with label Baba Ifakayode. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Baba Ifakayode. Show all posts
Monday, December 19, 2011
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Elders...R-E-S-P-E-C-T
Okay so today I'm going to get my nerve up and talk about eldership. I will look at it from the African American/Diaspora aspect and the traditional aspect. Remember this is only my opinion based on what I have learned so far.
As a youth growing up I was taught many conflicting views on what it meant to be an elder and how to treat elders. On one hand as a small child you had to respect everyone that was considered an adult or that was at least old enough to babysit you. As you came into your teenage years you began to be told that you should respect those that respected you. Now, unless you were a total fool you knew that this, for the most part was not applicable to your close elders (mother, aunts, etc). When I started to have conflict with my father, I had to learn about this mutual respect ideology head on. I have OFTEN felt like my father was disrespecting me as a person in general. He said some very hurtful ugly things to me and then expected respect. He was nice to people outside the family, but then would be mean to us. Now, this is not the whole of who he is, but it's not untrue either. Anyhoo, I took the road of not respecting him to a degree. I did what I was told, but was NEVER happy about it and NEVER did anything extra for him. Now, with my mother, she was always respectful of us and so it was NO problem to give her the same. To this day if my Mama asks me for $5 I will try to give her $10. If she corrects me I humbly accept the wisdom and move on. My behavior is not all that uncommon here in the diaspora. The truth is that many of our elders are simply that, elders, but lack a lot in regard to having standards of behavior. This observation accounts for the foolishness that we see from the generations that they rear. My relationship with my father was directly reflected in my relationships with men.
Yeye (Yeye Lawo Olomitutu) is from Nigeria and has told me that they regard elders based on age.The character or initiation of the Elder can be somewhat irrelevant. Of course I'm sure that on the whole they strive for good and gentle character, but as she has taught me, if they are found lacking you (the junior) are not free to act on that. Meaning that if they curse you completely out you are expected to take it, learn from it, and move forward. Iya (Iyanifa Ifalola Sangoyemi) has always woven lessons on respect for elders into conversations. Often they were very hard pills to swallow, but I took my medicine like a big girl...most of the time. These lessons on an almost blind respect for elders has in many ways saved my relationship with my father. I still draw some boundaries to be honest because I feel the need to protect my family from some of that foolishness, but I do so respectfully. I allow myself some space for learning. I also keep in mind that Ifa has standards that don't care one bit about "how I was raised". Because of this, I have had to take a few classes in humility
There is one more difference here in the diaspora that probably wouldn't happen as much in Nigeria. Here many of us are reconnected to Ifa (ATRs) as adults. This can make figuring out elders an interesting game. Here is an example. I am actually older (by about a year) than my Iya, but she is initiated Sango AND Ifa. Now, 9 times out of 10 that wouldn't have happened if we were raised in the tradition. So natally I am actually her elder, but she is twice initiated mine. As a matter of fact my husband is about 7 years her elder natally, but she's our Iya (mother). Humility, gratefulness, and her old soul make it both easy and a joy to kneel at her feet when we see her. She has literally saved me and brought me to Ifa. The other cool thing is that she, imho, was really old when she transitioned from her last life so she is a really old soul this life. Ifa, looks out for the small things. ;). There is a little boy that might possibly be initiated before me, and guess what? If this happens I will salute him as required by Ifa and expect him to do as he is asked in other regards. This is simply the way things must be navigated with a culture that is trying to play catch up with reconnecting with our roots.
My prayer is that you will read this as one of my on going lessons, not as a reason for division or disagreement with what you may believe. We, as Afrikan Americans, have a very unique experience to put it nicely. We have to make some adjustments at times in regards to our ATRs/DTRs, but in the end we should all find some common lessons. These lessons should be humility, love, gratefulness, truth, honesty, and community.
Again, these are just the humble lessons and opinions of an Ifa baby...
As a youth growing up I was taught many conflicting views on what it meant to be an elder and how to treat elders. On one hand as a small child you had to respect everyone that was considered an adult or that was at least old enough to babysit you. As you came into your teenage years you began to be told that you should respect those that respected you. Now, unless you were a total fool you knew that this, for the most part was not applicable to your close elders (mother, aunts, etc). When I started to have conflict with my father, I had to learn about this mutual respect ideology head on. I have OFTEN felt like my father was disrespecting me as a person in general. He said some very hurtful ugly things to me and then expected respect. He was nice to people outside the family, but then would be mean to us. Now, this is not the whole of who he is, but it's not untrue either. Anyhoo, I took the road of not respecting him to a degree. I did what I was told, but was NEVER happy about it and NEVER did anything extra for him. Now, with my mother, she was always respectful of us and so it was NO problem to give her the same. To this day if my Mama asks me for $5 I will try to give her $10. If she corrects me I humbly accept the wisdom and move on. My behavior is not all that uncommon here in the diaspora. The truth is that many of our elders are simply that, elders, but lack a lot in regard to having standards of behavior. This observation accounts for the foolishness that we see from the generations that they rear. My relationship with my father was directly reflected in my relationships with men.
Yeye (Yeye Lawo Olomitutu) is from Nigeria and has told me that they regard elders based on age.The character or initiation of the Elder can be somewhat irrelevant. Of course I'm sure that on the whole they strive for good and gentle character, but as she has taught me, if they are found lacking you (the junior) are not free to act on that. Meaning that if they curse you completely out you are expected to take it, learn from it, and move forward. Iya (Iyanifa Ifalola Sangoyemi) has always woven lessons on respect for elders into conversations. Often they were very hard pills to swallow, but I took my medicine like a big girl...most of the time. These lessons on an almost blind respect for elders has in many ways saved my relationship with my father. I still draw some boundaries to be honest because I feel the need to protect my family from some of that foolishness, but I do so respectfully. I allow myself some space for learning. I also keep in mind that Ifa has standards that don't care one bit about "how I was raised". Because of this, I have had to take a few classes in humility
There is one more difference here in the diaspora that probably wouldn't happen as much in Nigeria. Here many of us are reconnected to Ifa (ATRs) as adults. This can make figuring out elders an interesting game. Here is an example. I am actually older (by about a year) than my Iya, but she is initiated Sango AND Ifa. Now, 9 times out of 10 that wouldn't have happened if we were raised in the tradition. So natally I am actually her elder, but she is twice initiated mine. As a matter of fact my husband is about 7 years her elder natally, but she's our Iya (mother). Humility, gratefulness, and her old soul make it both easy and a joy to kneel at her feet when we see her. She has literally saved me and brought me to Ifa. The other cool thing is that she, imho, was really old when she transitioned from her last life so she is a really old soul this life. Ifa, looks out for the small things. ;). There is a little boy that might possibly be initiated before me, and guess what? If this happens I will salute him as required by Ifa and expect him to do as he is asked in other regards. This is simply the way things must be navigated with a culture that is trying to play catch up with reconnecting with our roots.
My prayer is that you will read this as one of my on going lessons, not as a reason for division or disagreement with what you may believe. We, as Afrikan Americans, have a very unique experience to put it nicely. We have to make some adjustments at times in regards to our ATRs/DTRs, but in the end we should all find some common lessons. These lessons should be humility, love, gratefulness, truth, honesty, and community.
Again, these are just the humble lessons and opinions of an Ifa baby...
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
Hand of Ifa Weekend
Let me first say that I am changed forever. The weekend of May 20th my husband and I received our Hand of Ifa. I short, you receive some information about yourself that helps you to develop further in the tradition and you also receive the tools to continue to stay in contact with the necessary energies. I don't really feel comfortable saying much more than that because I already feel as though too much information in just kinda hanging around in cyber space.
I would, however, like to speak on the beauty of the experience.
Community/Family
We all learned something about what real community and family looks like. We arrived and got lost in the neighborhood and Iya and Yeye (both mean mother but that's what we stick with for differentiation) came to rescue us. When I saw Iya's face I was SO EXCITED!!! I immediately knew I was home. When we got to the house they had bought food from a Senegalese restaurant and didn't ask for a dime. Wait, forgot to tell you. We had only been greeting via verbal instructions. It was a little different, but it felt good to see and do all the bowing. They are so worthy of it. It was wonderful for the children to learn it also. Back to the food. It was delicious. All my vegetarian ways were on hold for the weekend because I thought myself a little haughty to expect someone who is kind enough to feed us to rearrange their eating habits. Plus to be honest, MY IYA CAN COOK!!! OMG!!! If we had stayed any longer I would have been a cow. One thing that my husband loved was that EVERYBODY is EVERY child's Iya and Baba. I didn't have to worry about where they were and what they were doing. They were also very excited to meet Iya's two girls. Let's be honest I was SUPER excited to meet them. They are such wonderful STRONG little women. Olamide even gained a teacher while we were there. They have so much in common and he is a magnificent Awo. Baba Ifakayode's duality shows in a very beautiful way and is a very balanced omo Esu. Honestly he is like the male version of my Iya so I gotta love 'im. Long story short I have a whole new family and I love them all. My heart has been wanting to return since we pulled out of her driveway. We all cried off and on as we left Atlanta.
Culture/Spirituality
We learned A LOT!!! The thing that I really enjoyed is that if you just have a conversation with the people I met you are going to learn SOMETHING. If you are around them and don't learn, it's because you choose ignorance. Once 3 conversations were going on at once and I just walked room to room trying my best to get it all. Yeye is originally from The Continent so I love that. She has a better grip on the actual cultural aspect and I really appreciate that. Plus she is just the bomb when it comes to Ifa. She can explain things in ways that make the most complex idea simply and easy to learn. She is Omo Sango/Osun but also has been initiate to Obatala. The bomb right? Purdy much. Iya is a southern girl by birth, but her heart has the strength of the Congo and the beauty of Ifa. I just love her for every reason and no reason at all. She saved me from a really bad situation so I owe her my life. I am forever in her debt and at her beck-and-call. I loved learning all of the things she taught us. I really love casting obi and tending the shrines. She is a really straight forward in your face kind of teacher. She ain't gone pull no punches. Her strengths are her humility and love for honesty. That's why we get along so well. I know she is safe, because she values the same things I do. She is truly omo Sango/Oya.
That short weekend made me able to go back home and pick up on my reading and have it come alive. Ifa is real to me. I can feel it now. I give thanks. Ase.
I would, however, like to speak on the beauty of the experience.
Community/Family
We all learned something about what real community and family looks like. We arrived and got lost in the neighborhood and Iya and Yeye (both mean mother but that's what we stick with for differentiation) came to rescue us. When I saw Iya's face I was SO EXCITED!!! I immediately knew I was home. When we got to the house they had bought food from a Senegalese restaurant and didn't ask for a dime. Wait, forgot to tell you. We had only been greeting via verbal instructions. It was a little different, but it felt good to see and do all the bowing. They are so worthy of it. It was wonderful for the children to learn it also. Back to the food. It was delicious. All my vegetarian ways were on hold for the weekend because I thought myself a little haughty to expect someone who is kind enough to feed us to rearrange their eating habits. Plus to be honest, MY IYA CAN COOK!!! OMG!!! If we had stayed any longer I would have been a cow. One thing that my husband loved was that EVERYBODY is EVERY child's Iya and Baba. I didn't have to worry about where they were and what they were doing. They were also very excited to meet Iya's two girls. Let's be honest I was SUPER excited to meet them. They are such wonderful STRONG little women. Olamide even gained a teacher while we were there. They have so much in common and he is a magnificent Awo. Baba Ifakayode's duality shows in a very beautiful way and is a very balanced omo Esu. Honestly he is like the male version of my Iya so I gotta love 'im. Long story short I have a whole new family and I love them all. My heart has been wanting to return since we pulled out of her driveway. We all cried off and on as we left Atlanta.
Culture/Spirituality
We learned A LOT!!! The thing that I really enjoyed is that if you just have a conversation with the people I met you are going to learn SOMETHING. If you are around them and don't learn, it's because you choose ignorance. Once 3 conversations were going on at once and I just walked room to room trying my best to get it all. Yeye is originally from The Continent so I love that. She has a better grip on the actual cultural aspect and I really appreciate that. Plus she is just the bomb when it comes to Ifa. She can explain things in ways that make the most complex idea simply and easy to learn. She is Omo Sango/Osun but also has been initiate to Obatala. The bomb right? Purdy much. Iya is a southern girl by birth, but her heart has the strength of the Congo and the beauty of Ifa. I just love her for every reason and no reason at all. She saved me from a really bad situation so I owe her my life. I am forever in her debt and at her beck-and-call. I loved learning all of the things she taught us. I really love casting obi and tending the shrines. She is a really straight forward in your face kind of teacher. She ain't gone pull no punches. Her strengths are her humility and love for honesty. That's why we get along so well. I know she is safe, because she values the same things I do. She is truly omo Sango/Oya.
That short weekend made me able to go back home and pick up on my reading and have it come alive. Ifa is real to me. I can feel it now. I give thanks. Ase.
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