Friday, April 15, 2011

Grateful? Not this time.

Background story. I had a client that was scheduled for 8am. She called and said that she was going to be late. She was late due to circumstances that could have been avoided. SN, being late is a MAJOR pet peeve. She said she would be there at 8:30am. Okay fine. She arrived at 8:41am with coffee in hand--coffee from the gas station. I was a little pissed, but I figured that I'd make up the time if I hurried. Well, as hard as I tried it didn't happen. My next person came and had to wait about 20 minutes, and I was not happy. I apologized and called my third client to let her know I was running late. When the first client was done, she stood up and announced that she needed to go to the ATM because she didn't want to stop that morning because she was already late. Remember the coffee she had? She stopped for coffee, but not for my money? She asked if I had paypal. I said yes and that it was fine if she used that method instead. This is where my trusting people kicked me square in the ass AGAIN. I was thinking that she would pay via paypal when she got home. I've done that plenty of times with clients and it has never been a problem. I finished her hair at 11am and sent her money request via paypal. I texted about 3 or 4 pm to see if she had gotten the email because it wasn't in my account. I called about 7pm and it went straight to voicemail. Really? I went to bed. No money. Woke up. No money At this point it's not even about the money anymore, it's the principle of the thing. She called me 1pm (next day), but I was with someone and didn't answer the phone. I checked the account and it was there. She didn't leave a voicemail and didn't even tip me. Now to the reason for the title of the post...

So of course I'd talked to my Mom about what happened. She gave me the business-woman-you-can-do-this-don't-put-up-with-that pep talk. When she came over today, I gave her the update about the fact that I'd just received my money about 30minute prior to her arrival. This is where my Father jumped in.

F:  You should be grateful.
M: For what?
F: That you got your money. (matter of fact tone)
M: I should be grateful that I got my money? Are you serious?
F: I mean, she could've not even paid you. 
M: Wait. So you want me to be grateful that I did a service and got paid for it? You want me to be grateful that I utilized a skill and expected to be compensated due to the fact that payment was a part of the deal?
F: Yep.
M: I ain't budging on this one. You can't forget it. I refuse to be grateful. She should be grateful that I even fooled with her behind if somebody gone be grateful for anything. (arrogant, I know, but I was mad by then)
F: Well, you should be grateful that you got you money at all. 
M: No (I started talking to my mother)
I realized after that foolish conversation where some of my imbalance comes from. He has the "turn the other cheek" mentality. There are times in life when that is the best thing to do. This is NOT one of them. How do I feed my children if I just let people decide whether they pay? Seriously? I don't even know how he could possibly validate this when he is self employed. I've seen him get pissed about money a lot over the years, so is it just that I don't deserve to be treated with respect?

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