This is going to be one of those long story short kind of things. I was raised Christian as you know. When I was Georgia I was exposed for the first time to Afrikan beliefs and such. It was like a whole new world opened up. As with any whole new world there is both good and bad. The bad was that the people that introduced me to it were extremely manipulative and so that put a bad taste in my mouth, but for many reasons I was stuck in the situation. I met a Babalawo, and went to Miami to stay with him in the capacity of a help/CNA while he was sick. In exchanged for my work he taught me a lot. He, however, kept thinking that I should want to marry him (he was 60 or 70 and I was in my early 20s. UGH!) I still loved the culture. Although I went back to church and became a minister I think that I seed was planted. Current day. I have been on FB for a while like most people. Also, like most people, I don't really "know" most of the people that I am friends with. For me that makes sense because if we are really friends I could just call you. Anyway. I was on FB one day and this Sista that I had been FB friends with for a while said something to me. We never really talked before that, we just crossed paths. That day has changed my life. We have so much in common and she is just wonderful to me. I know that she is a God send. I don't know how long she is supposed to be in my life, but I will learn all I can while she is here.
It's funny to me how things came full circle, because she practicing Ifa and is training to be a priestess I believe. I have really found a sister in her and it feels like a coming home. The only problem now is that I have allowed myself to become scared of everything and so I am very timid with a lot of decisions that I know need to be made. It's okay, because like somebody said in my honesty box on FB, "you are growing", and I am. Everyday, with every decision. I am getting stronger and more confident. My only hold up know is that if I am initiated to priestess I will have to wear white for a year I think and then my Mama will know what I am doing. I know that I have to follow my own path even if it flies in the face of everything everyone around me believes in, but that is easier said than done most times.
Just thought I would post an update.
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It was harder for me to come out as a non-believer (I use atheist for lack of a better word) to my siblings than my mom. I didn't want to be a "stumbling block" to them. I don't know much about Ifa. I'm scared to go from one religion to another (it may not be a religion - I don't know) but I think you should go for it! I feel a small connection to my ancestors although I don't know much aboout them and my family couldn't care less. I wish I could explore it. Maybe one day I will. Do what's right for you.
ReplyDeleteAs for connection with ancestors, that's not a religious thing imho. I think it is both science and birthrite. You can explore it. There are elements to it that are common throughout all original cultures. ;)
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