Life Lessons...

Hurt feelings: Every month we have a movie night. We have a WONDERFUL time. I mean it is perfection. We watch cerebral African-centered movies or lectures, our children play together, we eat, and we eat some of the best vegan and vegetarian food you have EVER had. I look forward to it every month. Well, this month everything just went wrong that day. The vibration in my house was just wrong. I remember all I keep yearning for was sage. It was like sage was going to set everything right with the world. Needless to say, I didn't have any charcoal. Long story short, out of 8 people 1 person showed up. I was crushed. I had considered canceling anyway, because my day was already jacked up but I didn't want anyone to be disappointed. I didn't want to let anybody down, so imagine how let down I felt. This doesn't seem like such a big deal now, but I was genuinely hurt that day.

How could I have avoided all of that drama? I could have gone with my first thoughts and paid attention to what my intuition and vibration were telling me. When I was feeling like the vibration in my house was "off" I should have saged to see if that would have helped. I don't even cook while angry, so why would I invite people into a house where they usually find peace and comfort and have them be met with bad energy instead. If the sage hadn't worked then I should have canceled. The truth of it is that people are not nearly as dependent on my as I like to think they are. Nobody would have been in tears if I had canceled. They would have understood. I also learned that it's okay if I need a break from something. It's okay if I'm too tire and worn out. What will the movie night cipher say at my funeral if I run myself ragged? "Well, she never canceled movie night and that's why we loved her." No, because that is not important. I have learned that while it's okay to want the best for those I love, I can't offer them my best if I'm sick, tired, or worn-the-hell-out.

Importance of Sisterhood: We had a sista cipher once. Prior to that, about a year or two ago, I was one of those women that thought other women were catty, backbiting, and impossible to deal with. I had a true and abiding dislike for women. As I have traveled this road I have learned that the feelings that I thought were aimed at "those women" were really aimed at myself. Dr. Phil said it best. When you focus in on something that you can't stand about a person just say, "There is something about you that I don't like in myself." That was exactly it. Anyway, we had the cipher and it was supposed to be a meeting, but as women so often do, we all pulled what we needed. It was beautiful and for the first time I realized that Sistahood is of the utmost importance. We talked about all kinds of things and it felt good. I was safe. I could cry without being judged. I could be healed rather than trying to do all of the healing. We are going to do it again, but this time with wine. lol I love them, because they are my sistas. We don't talk all the time and I don't think we need to, but we are there when it's important to share tissues, hugs, wisdom, laughter, stories, and wine.