This has been a f***ed up a** day!

This has been one of those days when you think, "You know? I should've stayed in the damn bed!"

I woke up really dizzy. My children weren't exactly what you'd call "on task", which was really stupid because today was a reading day! I keep tripping and almost falling and lawd knows I'm too old to be fallin'. Went to the store and got everything except what I went for and had to go right back in. While preparing lunch I pinched my hand in the garlic crusher AND broke the crusher. Then my husband was on the phone during lunch (that's a "hell naw" in my abode). I was whipping some shea butter and tried to melt the last bit off the sides of the pot to add to my own batch and caught my new pot on fire! When I tried to say that this wasn't a good day for me, my husband wants to be all "kosi ofo" which I wasn't trying to hear. Then I realized that I mixed up one of my standing appointments.

What did I learn?
1. Esu is good at his job.
2. Get up slowly when cleansing to avoid dizziness.
3. Part of the freedom of homeschooling is being able to have "off days".
4. Pay attention when you are walking
5. Make a list since you know that you don't ever remember everything at the store without one
6. When you see your METAL garlic press snap, don't try to use it anyway...or you might pinch your hand.
7. Let your husband talk on the phone during lunch and just handle it the way Osun did...with honey and ase.
8. It's a metal pot. Get over it and use some elbow grease to clean it, because you are too cheap to throw it      away.
9. My husband loves me, even when he doesn't say the right things. His heart always feels the right things.
10. When you are your own boss, shit happens. Wipe the shit up and clean it up really well with bleach.

Somethings we can control. Somethings we can't. Orun is our home. Aiye is the market place. I'm just here to learn what I need and get what I can in order to escape the wheel of reincarnation when Olodumare finds me worthy. For the first time. I really understand what that means. For the first time, it spoke to my heart. Ase. Ase. Ase o!

My injury that was inflicted by my garlic press...

Iyalosa OlaOmi Amoloku

My Beautiful Trip to the Grocery Store...

I was getting my few items from the grocery store shelves, when I noticed a sista crying. She kept her head turned away from people. Although everything in me wanted to hug her, listen to her, and comfort her I knew this this time was not that time.

As I stood in the line, I heard the familiar sniffing and decided that the least I could do was leave my change like I usually do. Maybe, that would me both of us feel a little better. As the manager came over to handle a problem from a previous customer, we began to talk like we always do. I wasn't paying attention and neither was the tearful sista behind me and the cashier rang up some of her food with my order. The thunder cracked, the lightening flashed, and I "Kawo-ed" as the cashier tried to remove her items from my order. His nerves were already shot from the issue he had with the customer before me. I gently touched his arm and asked, "Are you having a problem removing her items from my order?" He answered nervous and frustrated, "Yes, but I can get it off." I patted him and said, "Just leave it on there. It's fine. Don't even worry about it." He looked confused as I walked away.

I laughed when I noticed all the coiffed and weaved sistas waiting for their men to bring the cars around. I listened to them yelling because the brothas couldn't get the car as close as they wanted. I listened as the rain pounded the cars sounding like steel drum melodies. I strolled pass them all thinking, "I'm shole glad I got good hair."  That's what I say when it rains, and I am loving the fact that I no longer fear it because my hair is fly whether wet or dry. I stepped into the rain, and my shoes became a slippery hindrance. Because the rain had washed the ground clean I stopped between all the hollerin' brothas and sistas fighting for parking spaces to avoid the rain. I bent down and removed my shoes, retucked my lapa, and strolled to my car. I strolled. I didn't rush, not...one...bit. I let it wash me clean. I let it bless me. I let it revive me. I watched a brotha in socks and flip flops hip hop through puddles, all the while I was thinking,"You can't win. Just take off your shoes and sanctify this ground." As I got in the truck. I reflected on the beautiful simplicity that I'd just experienced. I prayed for rain to water my revive my garden. Who knew I it would revive my soul? Ase

Sango went to church yesterday...

When I go to church I often feel as if I am going against Orisa or just being plan old fake. Yesterday was different for me.

Yesterday, I was suddenly able to recognize the similarities between Sango and Christ. When they sang songs I recognized the story of Sango. Whey they talked about what Christ stood for, I hear the praise names and stories of Sango. Yesterday, as I sat on "the minister's row" taking pictures of children while wearing a red and white dashiki, it struggled to resist shouting "KAWOOOOOOOOO" at the top of my lungs. I met Sango on the front row yesterday. I suddenly felt sorry for the Christ figure. I suddenly realized how the European mindset has feminized what was probably once a very strong man.

I wandered why all day Saturday, I felt excited about my outfit for Sunday. I wondered why I couldn't stop thinking about draping myself in red and white (in Christian terms, the blood that was shed and the purity that comes from it). I wrapped my head in white, probably Obatala prepping me for a cool head in the midst of foolishness. I know now, that Sango wanted me draped in his energy to receive his energy. He wanted to bless me. He wanted to strengthen me. He wanted to dance with me, and I am humbled.

KAWOOOOOOOOOOO Kabiyesi!!!!!!!!!

My heart is so full...

I went to a wedding today and my heart is so full. I am so happy for this sista because she has found someone to spend the rest of her life with. I have seen her go through some major hurts and a lot of pain at times, but now her healer has come and I am so happy. It rained and rained and then the sun began to shine. Although she is Christian, I explained to her that Iya Osun was simply blessing her day with her sweet water raining down. I knew it to be true because I prayed for them at my shrine this morning. I wish that everyone in the world could feel the depth of love that is shared between a committed couple. To be able to look in someone else's eyes and see the depths of your very own soul reflected there.

Ore Yeye Mi OOOOOOOO!!!!!

I'd like to share a blog I follow...

This link is from a blog called River of Honey. The writer is a prietess of Osun and I believe celebrates the Santeria culture which is an offshoot of the original Yoruba culture. They were one of the keepers of the culture when we were stolen from Mama Africa. Anyway, here is the link. I really enjoy reading her blog and I hope you will too.

http://riverofhoney.wordpress.com/2011/04/13/living-spirituality-does-atr-measure-up/#comment-211

Roller Coaster Emotions...

I just need to write this. I don't feel balanced today. I want to laugh. I want to cry, as I allow Yemoja's waters to leave a salty streaks on my cheeks. I want to lay close to my husband as he prays over my Ori in offering to Obatala and have him reach deep into my center and help me release with the fire of Sango. I want to scream all of my pissed off-ness at the top of my lungs as an offering to Oya and then whisper encouragement to my children from the  honey coated lips of Osun. I want to crawl back in bed, turn my fan on, pull the covers up around my face, and pretend to be asleep while I listen to the birds chant Ifa.

Alas my apparent imbalance is so balanced, just so unfamiliar. Modupe gbogbo Orisa.

I'm omo who?

So, when I began this path I was CERTAIN that I was omo Oya. Why? Because I feel a strong connection to egun, cemeteries, and I am ride or die with my Sango husband. Well, we thought he was Sango...Anyhoo, we got our first readings done and it came up that I was omo Osun. Now, to be honest I was crushed. I almost cried. I literally felt rejected by Oya. I know that may sound stupid, but it is what it is. Akinlabi came up omo Sango. To be honest I could see some of that, but we were never quite certain that it was right. I expressed these concerns to Iya. I guess my Ori was wearing on her Ori, so she decided to find out if our initial reading was on point. Well...drum roll please.
Akinlabi is...
 and
Omo Obatala ati Ori. Makes perfect sense! I had no idea that you could have Ori as your guardian aside from the usual understanding of our dependence on Ori. Who knew? What's really interesting is that Obatala has a lot to do with Ori and Sango to the point Obatala can't really be separated from either one. Ase ooo!!!

I was found to be...

ati
 I am omo Osun ati Ifa...

I'll say this. It make perfect sense in regards to what I was told in my roots reading. I come from a family that worshipped Ifa and also created a lot of the tools/beading that the Ifa priest used.

For us this has very heavy implications. Akinlabi will become a priest of Obatala and will be Iyanifa and Osun priestess (well I guess the later still applies from the initial reading). Gotta be honest, I am very nervous. I figured that we would end up on a road like this because we both have always been prophesied to about "going into the ministry". I was dubbed a prophet, though I have blocked most of that ability and feel really stupid because now I need it and am having to work hard to get back what I had naturally. SN, please be grateful for whatever natural abilities you have. Never fear them, because they are to help you and complete you as an individual. All that being said, now I'm ready to get our full readings done. I am so scared an excited about my path. I guess, I just take it one day and one step at a time...

Egun shrine, Master Key, Inner Peace! OH MY!!! and a bonus...

Egun Shrine
Can I just say that I have never felt so connected in all my life? I love tending my shrine. I love communicating with my egun. For example, the other morning I was cooking eggs and toast for my children. I made some scrambled eggs (no salt), dry toast, and coffee for my egun. I sat it on my shrine feeling quite pleased with myself and excited to be doing something different with them. Later I went to hang out with them at the shrine and just as clearly I heard somebody say, "I like honey on my toast". I just laughed. How do I know it wasn't me? Because I don't even really like honey. I will mix it with peanut butter, but I don't even like it in tea or anything. I drizzled the honey and they seem to have been pleased. They will sometimes even tell me scriptures to read. I still have to purchase a Quran for the Muslims in the family (Fulani Cameroon) so that I can read to them too. My uncle also told me that he wants a puzzle. He LOVED puzzles and I forgot all about it until he asked for it. I need to add the Choctaw people to the mix of folks represented. I still have a really hard time acknowledging my father's side of the family. Long story for another day. I just have to remember that they are not as they were.

Master Key System
What can I say about this? I am reading part one and it is tedious, but has some really good information. This is going to teach me to quiet my mind so that I can meditate and hopefully trance and vision more readily. I have never been able to sit and still my mind. I want to be able to hear and respond appropriately to Spirit where ever I am. Part three looks much more interesting and I look forward to prepping myself for it. I'll be able to levitate by the end of it. lol

Inner Peace
OMG! Can you say LOVE IT? I love this book and I am only on the introduction! I love it! If I weren't married already I would marry it. It just makes things so understandable and helps you to know that where you are is where you are supposed to be like Ajoke told me a long time ago. I didn't believe her wholeheartedly, but I do now. Sssshhh, don't tell her that she was right all along as usual. lol I can't wait to really get into this book! I am so excited!

10 reasons I love Ifa Culture

1. The only thing that cannot be changed is the date of your birth and the date of your death. I love that because it gives me some type of control over my life and responsibility. I actually have choices.
2. Egun worship is foundational. I love the fact that we are EXPECTED to worship, venerate, respect, acknowledge, and connect with those that came before us in our bloodline both known and unknown. Beautiful thang people. It's a beautiful thang. 
3. Balance. I love the fact that where there is male there is female and where there is female there is also male. None is above the other and both are acknowledged equally. Unlike the system I was raised in, female energy is held in as high regard as male energy. I must admit this has been difficult for me as I am accustomed to be being second class, but I'm movin' on up. lol
4. Culture. I love that this is a culture rather than a religion. This is something that I think of in my every action and behavior. I acknowledge different aspects of this culture when I drive through an intersection, pass a cemetery or a river, walk a path in the woods or go off the beaten trail, or even drive over RR tracks. I love it!
5. You are allowed to have a show me attitude. You are not expected to just say that everything that does happen was because of your faith or everything failed because of your lack of faith. This was really easy for me to transition to. I hated when the church would pray for my husband repeatedly to get out of the wheelchair and it would never happen. They even went so far as to announce that it would happen by that next Sunday and of course it didn't. It caused so many of the youth to lose faith because imho either the preacher lied or God did because they said that God said he was going to walk in that next Sunday and it didn't happen. 
6. Each one teach one. When I tell you that I am surrounded by people with this attitude I mean it! Everybody is such a willing teacher as far as my experience so far. I know that everybody in this culture isn't going to be that way and I'm not going to fool myself, but I have a wonderful circle of Sistas. Lessons are valued based on effectiveness not titles. We are all able to learn from one another and it is beautiful. If you mess with any of them I'll kick your ass! This takes me to my next point...
7. Iwa pele. Gentle character. Good character. I'll still kick your ass, but only with good reason and then I will reflect on how we came to the point of physical conflict to help you to avoid pissing me off the next time. Seriously, it is the core of the culture. I even look at as meaning wise character. Ifalola taught me this lesson early on. It was a hard on too, because I have pitbull tendencies. I am extremely loyal, but DO NOT CROSS ME! *whoooooosaaaaaaa*
8. Connection with nature. All the orisa are forces of nature. You can't disrespect nature without disrespecting them. If you take a flower, you leave an offering. That has made me think before I just go snatching flowers and such from their homes. Everything has a purpose and there is a price to pay for removing a specimen from it's home and purpose. We love to go to the creek and Mari used to get rocks. Well, now we know that we should offer something to Iya Osun, ask permission, and make an offering if we are allowed to remove it.
9. From birth. This culture on the continent starts from the literal moment we return to this plane. It tells me that this is for ALL ages. There is no children's church etc. to separate the children from the rest of the community. From the very beginning they are taught this culture, not by worksheets and such, but by living it out hands on with everyone in the community.
10. Children are blessings and not burdens. I have to be honest. This is one that I am still working on. I have spent a lot of time speaking that children, mine included, are burdensome. It was just they way I learned from what I saw and or heard at different points (not from my Mama). It didn't help that I was a single parent for quite a while. Maybe that was just a self fulfilling prophecy. Idk. Either way I am relearning this beautiful lesson. My children are blessings indeed and for all I know I maybe born again as their grandchild. :)

Be clear on whatcha ask for!

Are my ancestors listening to me? Yes. Do they still seem to retain their earthly personalities? Yep.

So, I asked them to talk to me in my dreams rather than when I'm awake thinking that I would be able to sleep in mornings. Well, they did show me some things last night in my dreams, but they didn't let me sleep. Actually, I was awakened even earlier. 4:45am to be exact. That's okay because they are just being themselves and I feel that we have a lot of work to do.

I am still very excited about this journey and even excited about being omo Osun now that I understand more about her. The way that most people portrayed her wasn't very palatable to me, but lucky for you, I am going to teach you as I learn. You can't know the "deep things" because that isn't just for the curious, but I am looking to correct some things about The Mother of the Sweet Water.